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Even for people like me who the whole dance and the chase and the thrill of the new, there will be points when you really just want to take a step back from it for a while and catch your breath and let your ego recover from the beatings that tend to come with it. But just as when you’re trying to meet your future snugglebunny the old-fashioned way, it’s important to understand the potential headaches that come with those marathon OKCupid sessions.
Many of the things that drive people away from online dating can be headed off at the pass with some preparation.
” Remember what I said earlier about how we mentally filter people into “attractive” and “not attractive” when we meet them in person?
The lack of non-verbal cues that attract us to others don’t carry across in online dating and, as a result, you’ll occasionally come across people who seem great on paper but who don’t turn you on in person.
When we meet somebody in person, we have hundreds of thousands of verbal and non-verbal clues to give us an intuitive grasp of who we’re talking to and whether or not we’re into them long before we go up and introduce ourselves.
Everything from how they stand to how they talk, who they talk to, how they act around their friends, how they smell, even the pitch and timbre of their voice indicate whether or not we’re likely to have an initial attraction to them that would prompt us to make that all-important first approach.
Don’t call attention to it, just work it into your “About Me” section or “What I’m Looking For”.
If your brand of humor trends to the physical or being silly, then post that picture of you as the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man from last Halloween or doing something wacky.
Online dating takes a different attitude and skill-set than, say, making cold approaches at a bar or flirting with someone you met at a house party.You have to treat your dating profile as an advertisement; you are, after all, selling yourself to others.This means that you have to consider your market, what you’re looking for and what makes you, specifically, attractive to others.You also have to consider where and how to present your best self.If you’re the sort of person who’s clever and witty, then you want to look more towards a site like OKCupid that lets you display your humor like the tail of an Oscar Wilde-loving peacock.